Chapter 121: Turns Out I'm the Melon/Vegetable (idiom for being easily defeated)!

Chapter 121: Turns Out I'm the Melon/Vegetable (idiom for being easily defeated)!

"You've been watching for so long—your hands must be itching, right?"

Having respawned before the bonfire, Zhang Yi turned to Wang Han, who was casually discarding grape peels beside him.

Hearing Zhang Yi's words, Wang Han glanced at the game screen and immediately replied, "My hands may itch, but my skin sure doesn't!"

Sighing, Zhang Yi continued guiding his character through exploration.

The current area, High Wall of Lothric, was far more complex in layout compared to the earlier Firelink Shrine and Cemetery of Ash. Without a map, it was impossible to know where to go.

But there was an even more critical reason: his experience in this game so far could truly be described as "cutting melons and vegetables."

Well… he was the melon/vegetable.

In the High Wall of Lothric, apart from the Hollow Soldier mobs kneeling on the ground like passive pilgrims, nearly every other mob had the power to kill him.

And the most crucial point wasn’t just that these mobs, like the Crystal Lizard, Uchigatana Guy, or the first encounter with Gundyr the Ash, could overpower him through sheer strength.

The real issue was that these mobs were mostly dishonorable.

Often, around a corner, a mob wielding a short sword would suddenly appear and unleash a full combo. If his health wasn't full, he could die instantly.

Worse still, it was easy to accidentally attract two or three mobs at once. When they attacked together, Zhang Yi wasn’t sure if it was an illusion, but he felt it was even harder than fighting Gundyr the Ash earlier.

Especially one mob resembling a Hollow Hound—it was agile and dealt high damage.

Then there were mobs armed with Fire Crossbows, hiding in wall crevices. They remained motionless as he passed. Only when he reached the lower area and started fighting other monsters would they begin firing cold arrows from behind.

There were also mobs hiding behind boxes. If he wasn’t careful and turned his back, they’d even perform backstabs.

An ARPG game had given Zhang Yi the same feeling he had when playing Outlast—because you never knew what traps lay ahead.

But that alone might have been tolerable.

The thing was, these dishonorable mobs were mostly weaklings. In a one-on-one duel, as long as he wasn’t too reckless, they were easy to defeat.

However, as Zhang Yi explored deeper into the High Wall of Lothric map, he encountered some tougher opponents.

On a corridor leading toward a guard tower, he encountered a Lothric Knight wielding sword and shield.

This character had appeared in the promotional trailer, but only as background scenery—merely a mob being executed via Perfect Guard.

"Finally, a monster willing to face me head-on, one-on-one!" Zhang Yi exclaimed, moved to tears.

"Come on! Let’s have a fair and equal duel!"

When two meet on a narrow path, the brave shall prevail. Zhang Yi felt his blood boiling with excitement.

After constantly being ganged up on, after enduring dishonorable tactics, he finally had a chance for a fair 1v1 showdown.

The Lothric Knight clearly noticed him too, raising his weapon in combat stance.

Advance and retreat, testing each other cautiously.

Unaware, Zhang Yi slowly advanced into the dark sentry tower.

Then—"Click Sound"—a box shattered.

A mob with a dagger suddenly leapt out from somewhere and delivered a backstab.

"Pfft!"

Blood sprayed. The dishonorable mob kicked him off balance. As he struggled to stand, the Lothric Knight swiftly swung his blade.

Zhang Yi, deceased!

"You said 1v1, yet you secretly summoned helpers!" Zhang Yi was utterly stunned!

"You stay right there! Don’t you dare run!" After making a bold statement, Zhang Yi respawned at the nearest bonfire.

Returning once more, this time he was smarter. He performed several rolling dodges to avoid the Lothric Knight, located the mob that had ambushed him earlier inside the dark tower, and eliminated it before facing the knight.

"I’ll practice my Perfect Guard on you! Let me show you what a true Firelinking Hero is made of!"

Shield raised, Zhang Yi drew Aggro and stood still, determined to hone his Perfect Guard technique.

First Perfect Guard: one Estus Flask.

Second Perfect Guard: two Estus Flasks.

The third time, sensing danger, Zhang Yi chose not to Perfect Guard. Instead, he waited behind his shield for the Lothric Knight’s attack to end, planning to counterattack.

But facing a shielded Zhang Yi, the Lothric Knight simply charged forward, slamming his own shield into him.

The impact drained Zhang Yi’s stamina bar as fast as a health bar being struck, leaving his character stunned from exhaustion.

The Lothric Knight calmly delivered a combo, emptying the health bar and teaching Zhang Yi another lesson in Chinese characters.

"Why do all the mobs after Gundyr the Ash feel like they deal just as much damage?" Zhang Yi fell silent after respawning at the bonfire.

He’d initially thought Gundyr the Ash was one of the stronger early enemies, but now the Crystal Lizard, Uchigatana Guy, and even this Lothric Knight—all seemed incredibly tough!

"Maybe it's just the game's design?" Wang Han offered from the side.

Hearing that, Zhang Yi was speechless.

Exploring further into the High Wall of Lothric, he encountered a wider variety of monsters.

Now he was absolutely certain of one thing:

This was definitely a very difficult game.

In fact, Zhang Yi felt that just traveling through the areas was slightly harder than fighting the bosses.

Eye contact confirmed: these were monsters best avoided.

Zhang Yi decided to temporarily bypass the Lothric Knight and continue exploring elsewhere.

Elsewhere, on a bridge swarming with monsters, Zhang Yi prepared to lure them out one by one and eliminate them. Suddenly, a wyvern descended from the sky and unleashed flames directly onto the bridge.

Just like the other monsters on the bridge, Zhang Yi once again learned how to write 【YOU DIED】.

After enduring countless deaths and gaining experience through trial and error, Zhang Yi finally entered the sentry tower room.

But something felt odd—there were no monsters inside.

And in a corner downstairs, he spotted a treasure chest.

"A treasure chest?" Approaching it, Zhang Yi saw an interaction prompt appear on the screen, his face lighting up with surprise.

Finally, new gear!

After all, in most ARPGs, treasure chests were synonymous with powerful equipment!

Staring at the chest, Zhang Yi felt utterly content.

He pressed the interaction button—but what happened next stunned him.

Inside wasn’t a great treasure. Instead, the chest’s opening was lined with sharp teeth.

Then a long tongue and a pair of hands shot out, grabbing his character.

"What the hell is this!?"

Zhang Yi nearly jumped out of his seat, almost dropping his mouse.

The Mimic’s sharp teeth clamped down viciously on his character’s head.

Blood burst out. His character struggled desperately, but the health bar emptied instantly, as if it had vanished.

After a brief struggle, all movement ceased.

The game screen faded to black.

Once again, the three familiar crimson letters appeared in the center of the screen.

"What the hell! The chest was a trap!?" Zhang Yi’s eyes widened, completely bewildered.

But shortly after respawning at the bonfire, he prepared to return—not just to retrieve souls, but for revenge!

Based on past experience, these sneaky monsters were probably weak.

Returning to the treasure chest room, thirty seconds later…

In the cramped room, Zhang Yi watched helplessly as the Mimic grabbed his character, pulling him into its gaping maw. He slowly set down the mouse.

Patting his chest gently, he told himself this wasn’t surrender—this was "A gentleman's revenge is never too late, even after ten years."

Like the shortcut Uchigatana Guy or the Lothric Knight, he could die a few more times to learn their attack routines and defeat them easily.

But the frustration in his chest made him quietly shut down the computer.

He decided he’d played enough for today. If he kept going, he was worried his newly purchased keyboard and mouse might not survive.

Just then, his phone on the desk rang.

He checked—it was a message from his old acquaintance, Song Ren.

"Old Zhang, how are you spending National Day? I'm screwed—just checked into the hotel, and my boss is such an idiot! Who sends employees on business trips during National Day?"

Reading the message, Zhang Yi replied: "Playing a game. Remember that Dark Souls we saw at the exhibition? It launched today. Have you tried it?"

Less than two seconds later, a reply came: 'Haven't played yet. Hey, is it fun? If not, I won't bother buying it.'

Seeing this, Zhang Yi instantly recalled why he’d played Outlast in the first place. He quickly typed back: "Epic, grand storyline, top-tier graphics and sense of impact. The gameplay experience can only be described in four words: cutting melons and vegetables!"

That night, logging into his girlfriend Wang Han’s Nebula Games account, Zhang Yi had just purchased Dark Souls for her. Seeing Song Ren’s incoming message, he burst out laughing unkindly.

The message was simple: 'This is what you call cutting melons and vegetables?!'

It was just text, but Zhang Yi could vividly picture Song Ren’s expression on the other side of the screen.

(Picking up a repaired broken bowl, pitifully begging for Monthly Passes and recommendation votes...)

(End of Chapter)<>